February 14, 2011

i know you want to be in my bed

i finally finished my first custom on my fakey Blythe today! it was a lot of work and it taught me a lot. here's what she looked like before i got my hands on her:

pretty awful, right? but here she is after, as of today.

 her name's Vickie Venom, or Vi for short,  and she's the lead singer/guitarist of her band, St. Valentine's Day Massacre.



she's not perfect, but i'm really happy with the way she came out. originally i had planned to give her an asymmetrical bob, but i kind of like her with the long hair, so it stays for now. i was also worried that maybe i carved her smile too wide and it would give her a creepy Cheshire cat sort of quality, but i think it looks all right, kind of mischievous. it was quite a headache working on her (my god, her EYES!), but i'm happy now. i like her.<3

my next project when i can afford it is to make a dark-skinned doll, which involves spray paint since the manufacturors of blythes and blythe knock-offs don't produce dolls of color, which is really bogus. but where there is a will, there is a way.

February 4, 2011

Beauty and the Beast

watched Disney's Beauty and the Beast for the first time since i was a little kid. it held up pretty well, but this was always one of my favorites. one thing that really impressed me that i didn't really have an appreciation for as a kid was how gorgeous the backgrounds are. maybe some of the best i've ever seen in an animated film. one thing that kinda bothered me though was i didn't really like the style or whatever the background/extra characters were drawn in...i get that they have to be simpler than the main characters, but they just seemed too much so, and they seemed rounder, cartoonier, like Warner Bros. style instead of Disney. i guess it's not really a big deal, but it kept getting to me for some reason.

there are kind of a lot of weird stylistic choices in this movie.

one of the main reasons i've been wanting to rewatch it was that i've read a few feminist blogs/essays commenting on how sexist Disney films are, and the messages they are inundating into youth, especially young girls. (this is probably the best one i've found.) something i kept reading about Beauty and the Beast was that, in a nutshell, it's basic lesson is that if a woman stays with an abusive beast, he'll turn into a kind prince. i think this is a bit of a simplistic viewpoint. i find the relationship between Belle and the Beast to be perhaps the most dynamic and interesting of all Disney relationships. yes, things start off rocky when your new room mate has locked your dad in his dungeon and you have to barter for his life. but they actually spend time together, get to know each other presumably, unlike other Disney romances that blossom after one chance meeting and a song.

the Beast is abusive, i make no excuses for him there. but coming at it from the perspective of someone who intimately knows people that have been abusers, i can kind of sympathize with Beast to a degree. still, that gives him no right to continually traumatize and intimidate Belle, and she finally tells him as much and leaves, only returning when he saves her freakin' life, which i guess is pretty redeeming. (yes, i know it's lame that she has to be saved at all, but to her credit, she's holding her own against the wolves before Beast shows up. but yes, she still has to be reliant on a man, argh.) i guess i see it less as a woman putting up with an abuser and more as a woman realizing that, although deeply flawed, an individual may be worth her time once he realizes he must treat her with respect. it's something that happens in the best relationships: people bring out the best in each other. but obviously i'm in the minority, and i'm not sure very young viewers would understand how complicated and multi-faceted people and relationships can be.
i guess in the dvd i got, there's some new scene/song added in that was originally cut from the movie. i really didn't like it or think it was necessary; it was obviously animated recently and therefore didn't match up to the rest of the movie and it didn't really add anything to the plot (there's a REASON they cut stuff out of movies, people who make dvds!), but there was one little thing i liked about it. there's a tiny scene where Belle and Beast are in the library reading together, and Beast admits he's almost illiterate, and Belle helps him along. this is both a touching moment, and perhaps the most intimate scene that reveals how close they're becoming up until the big ballroom dance thing.

another thing i can't help but like is that the dashing, handsome, muscly guy ends up being the villain.
although, when Beast transforms, he's probably the hottest prince ever, so it's kind of a draw, i guess.

things i don't like include Nafu, or whatever Gaston's sidekick's name is, reinforcing the stereotype Disney always has of short, squat, fat people being comedy relief not to be taken seriously, and they're usually evil or aligned with the evil party. also love, love, LOVE how Belle starts off in the movie, an alienated, educated daydreamer who is beautiful but doesn't use her beauty as a commodity, who wants adventure and something more than "this provincial life," only for her "grand adventure" that she longs for to end up being giving up her life for her father's to live in a dingy old castle with a beast who she then marries, the end. it kinda gives the impression that if young girls long for a better, more exciting life, marriage is the answer.


man, the scene where Belle fumes about Gaston's arrogance in presuming she'll marry him, and she runs outside and there's that beautiful sunset over the fields of grass and the forest as she emotes with her arms and proclaims "i want ADVENTURE in the great, wide SOMEWHERE! i want it more than i can tell!" wow, that scene got me so fired up as a kid, even at 6 or 7 or however old i was, watching that art combined with that sentiment on the big screen in front of me, i was absolutely riveted! and it still holds up, that scene still gets me. i just wish that Belle was the Belle we got through the rest of the film.

and while i admit it's a little sad that Disney doesn't try harder or realize the effects it has one children and our culture in general, especially on things like gender roles, it also feels unfair to me to lump all of this blame on Disney when their movies are just retellings of folktales and fairytales that go way, way back, and therefore embody a different set of morals and values than we embrace today.

i was actually kind of impressed with how closely the Disney version followed the original story in this particular instance. Disney's Beast is more of a jerk, but that kinda makes more sense as to why he would've gotten cursed in the first place.
maybe i'm biased, because i just love fairytales in general, and sometimes it feels like a conflict of interest, being a feminist and loving stories that reinforce gender stereotypes and portray women as sleeping, obedient, paragons of purity and virtue and at the same time sexual desire, to be conquered, raped, protected, but never empowered. there's a great deal of romance to be found in suffering. maybe that's why i like fairytales and saints. as a young girl, in love with my own suffering, i fell in love with the unbearable but saintly suffering and love of the little mermaid when she turned to foam rather than kill her only love. my love knew no bounds for the little match girl who finally saw heavenly paradise as she froze to death in the street. the ones that feature tragedy and pain and make martyrs of its princesses are the most compelling to me.

i really like Beauty and the Beast being in a Rococo-type setting. i like the visual juxtaposition of opulence and  daintiness with the frightening beast.

February 1, 2011

wax fruit

costume design, blah.




notes: Ronnie - i know all her outfits are pretty similar, but that's just how i imagine her dressing. i see her as being really lazy and having no shame. 
Fuss - probably the only real "fashionista" of the group. being brought up in an affluent family, i see her having elegant tastes and liking fashion, especially since she has the "model build," but she still steers toward stuff that has to do with racing and being fast, her real passion.
Jet - she was kinda tough for me, because Jet, deep down, is a sweet, naive giry-girl who likes animals and rainbows and stuff, but she desperately WANTS to be perceived as tough, so i tried to convey that a little through her style. i thought maybe she'd have some typical teenage clothes that she tries to "toughen up."
Lupe - one of the more challenging ones. i visualize Lupe being the girliest of the bunch, but at the same time, a post-apocalyptic environment kinda demands a certain practicality that makes skirts and other girly things seem out of place. so i tried to balance out Lupe's feminie tastes with the practical. i also thought since she's from the west it might be cool to put her in some western wear, like ponchos. i want to give her big 80's hair later on, but i'm not sure about these versions i drew here.
Shock - kinda punked out on Shock in the end. -_- i have some more ideas for her, but she's probably the biggest challenge for me right now. i see her as being pretty down-to-earth and tough. no-nonsense, but nice. i see her being a bit of a tomboy, but maybe she's still into fashion and stuff? i'm not sure. she's an ex-wrestler, so i was thinking maybe she could wear modified versions of her wrestling costumes?

got a daily deviation on deviantart today for my dinosaur laser battle drawing that spawned Dinogeddon. :D that's pretty exciting. i've always had a love-hate relationship with dA, but i'm really happy to finally get a DD like all my favorite artists on there. it also kinda made me realize the more visible you are, the more people will be dicks to you. i guess i just never thought of it before. but it's cool, i'm used to it in my everyday life, i just never really thought about it in terms of my art before. but i'd rather be visible and get hated on than be invisible.

January 25, 2011

lizard tail jerky

where has Terror Vision been all my life? this movie is so great in so many ways, i don't even know where to start. actually, just read this review from House of Self-Indulgence. it pretty much sums up my feelings about it much better than i could.

i even did some fan art!

i also wanted to do O.D. and some of the amazing Gerrit Graham's facial expressions, but i lost gumption toward the end.

any movie so liberally sprinkled with the word "butthole" is immediately dear to my heart.

a valentine to myself.

Shiina Ringo - Mellow video, YouTube

January 18, 2011

dream castle



...all spawned from a dream i had. sometimes i don't know if i should be grateful or weirded out by my dreams. most people have pretty straight-forward ones, or fantastical ones, but mine are usually kind of like a Dali painting; a bunch of disjointed, really crazy things with no apparent theme, but maybe there is an underlying one and i'm just not smart enough to figure it out, i don't know. at least this dream kinda had a story.


Aqua - Lollipop (Candyman) video, Youtube

Aqua - Barbie Girl video, YouTube

i love Aqua, totally un-ironically.

January 12, 2011

platinum soul

FINALLY got my first real Blythe in the mail today! so excited! She's a Kiss Me True. here's what she looked like in her pretty box.



comparing her with my fakey Blybe, i can see why a lot of Blythe devotees are so obsessed with having a "real" Blythe. i didn't really get it, i've never been a "brand name" girl when it comes to much of anything, but after getting one myself, i understand. She feels heavier, sturdier, more substantial, and just overall better-made. i really like her make up (especially her pearl pink lips!) and that her face has a slight shine, but isn't too shiny. her hair--WOW! this might be the best quality hair i've ever seen on a doll. it's very silky and long, but doesn't tangle. it doesn't feel quite as nice as real human hair natch, but it also doesn't feel like a plastic wig like the fakey. it does seem to take quite a bit more effort than i expected to pull her string and change her eyes, though.

i already took a couple pictures of her today. XD

i'm pleased with how photogenic she is. i'm trying to think of a backstory for her...i know "model" is dumb and predictable, but it seems pretty appropriate...
...or maybe  a motocross champ with a shadowy past...


...i think i'm naming her Astrid.

January 10, 2011

black cherry

saw a lot of movies lately...trying to remember them all...

saw Tron: Legacy in theatres. i wasn't really that into seeing it since i never even saw the original Tron, but i ended up liking it pretty well. the plot is pretty predictable, but the characters weren't quite as one-dimensional as i expected them to be, and i was pretty enthralled by the action sequences. CG younger Jeff Bridges with the dead eyes and pudding skin is pretty creepy, though.

finally saw Precious now that it's streaming on Netflix. my mom sent me the book it's based on a few months back, so i had the advantage/hindrance of having read and enjoyed the book before seeing the movie. i thought the movie was a very fine adaptation, though. it perfectly walked the line of showing you just enough of the utterly graphic, disturbing stuff from the book without it being gratuitous. and just like everyone else has said, Mo'Nique is absolutely amazing in this most disturbing of roles.

Shutter Island: i'm not sure i can quite say i enjoyed this movie, but i liked being mind-fucked by it, and it's definitely a pretty original and well-made movie. i give it credit for creating a constant air of genuine unease throughout, and for keeping me thinking about it days after i saw it.

Babies: been meaning to watch this for a long time, finally saw it on streaming today. it's not quite what i expected. it's very literally a silent camera watching four different babies from four different parts of the world for the first year of their lives. no narrator, subtitles, or explanations. which is fine i guess, but being that i'm pretty ignorant to a lot of the stuff i saw, i would have liked some kind of narration of the significance of certain different cultural practices and such. instead of imbuing this idea of human togetherness through the universalism of birth and raising children, it's instead a bit alienating seeing the different ways that people handle different things, but not knowing exactly why, if that makes any sense. it's really beautifully shot, though. my favorites were the Mongolian and Namibian baby, mainly because of how breathtaking their environments were, from the bright, multi-colored carpets and clothes inside the Mongolian tents to the beautiful red dirt and dust storms of Namibia. probably the most interesting sequence to me was showing how the different mothers bathed/cleaned their babies. of course the American and Tokyo babies were bathed in a shower or tub, but in Mongolia, where i'm assuming water is probably a bit more scarce and at least there's no plumbing, the mother bathed the baby in a washtub and sprayed water over him with her mouth, acting as her own shower. it also showed her clean his face with her own breast milk, very self-sufficient. and the Namibian mother licked her baby's face clean with an expertise i found entrancing; she'd work up a good spit, lick over her face, pause to spit out any grit or dirt, and repeat.

The Business of Being Born: i wasn't originally interested in seeing this until a friend discussed it with me, and i'm really glad i gave it a watch. very eye-opening. it's very significant to me how much women in American society have been conditioned to be terrified of giving birth naturally, and even told that they can't do it on their own. i think it's important for women to realize that they have a choice, which i wasn't even really aware of before this documentary. i also liked that it doesn't dismiss the medical industry, and does admit that birthing complications do happen and that hospital births can be life-saving, but on the whole high-risk births are relatively rare and most births can go just fine without medical intervention. i encourage anyone who's interested in this stuff, general medical history of midwifery and birthing in hospitals, or just women's rights and reproductive health issues to give this a watch. it's on streaming Netflix, and i think on YouTube, and probably other places online.

blah, blah, blah.


December 29, 2010

no one else is the same

just beat Fable 3...kinda obsessed with it for a bit, but not so much the gameplay itself, it sucks much worse than Fable 2 in a lot of ways, but i do really like a lot of the characters and character designs.

i love that in this game they made Reaver all Oscar Wilde-fabulous with his top hat and fur coat and cane. they even gave him a tiny heart tattoo on his cheek over his beauty mark so he's the ultimate fop now, haha.<3 a lot of girls/players seem to REALLY hate Elliot for some reason (your character's childhood sweetheart if you play a female character/the character you're "supposed" to marry), i guess because he's not a bad boy/pretty boy like Reaver and Ben Finn, but i think he's sweet. i love his Justin Beber hair, haha. a lot of their ire seems to come from the fact that the programming prohibits gender-specific interactions with him--like when you're a female hero, you pretty much can't help but be taller than all the guys in the game, and when you do interactions like kissing, you dip Elliot in your arms. XD i kinda love it though. i like that when i come home from adventuring he's always cleaning or in the kitchen, mwahaha. and i like that when you become queen he doesn't become your king or anything, he's just your consort or concubine or whatever, haha.

okay, i'm done geeking out. about that dumb game, anyway.

i finally got my fakey Blythe in the mail!! she's really cool, but i hate her hair so i tried to cut it and dye it, but i think it's hopeless. her hair won't take the dye at all, so i'm thinking i'm going to have to resort to rerooting her scalp, which i really didn't want to have to do. i'm also terrified of trying to get her eyechips out, Basaaks are notorious, but i'll worry about that when the time comes. i've made her a couple of cool pieces of clothes, though. and i dyed my fingers pink trying to dye her hair!
it fades fast, but it looked really cool and vibrant when i first did it. it made me start thinking about doing it on purpose all the time, like Henna, heheh.

i'm getting a Jem doll, too! i'm excited. i'm still kinda mad at my mom for selling all my Jem dolls in a garage sale without asking me. i really wanna get the Misfits, they're the best, but they're so expensive/hard to find!

December 15, 2010

the bite


after 20 pages, i feel like i'm finally beginning to get a feel for these characters and how i should be drawing them. it's decidedly looser, more cartoony, way more expressive, i think. most people probably won't like it, but i think it feels right. i feel like i tend to over complicate things, especially in art, like i'm trying to compensate or something. but sometimes less is more. not usually, but rarely.

ugh, the going is still so slow though, because of being drained from work so much. but i will prevail!

snow is ruining my life this week.

December 7, 2010

neige


France Gall and Serge Gainsbourg

hehe XD i love how many pictures there are of France with weird/creepy fake animals.

December 2, 2010

don'tcha know me?

finally watched Dead Ringer the other day. i'm a huge Bette Davis fan, and i liked the idea of her doing a horror/thriller-ish type of movie. well, actually, it turned out to be more like a thriller/mystery sort of thing.



Bette Davis plays twin sisters Edith and Margaret. Margaret married Edith's one true love under false pretenses twenty years ago, which obviously kinda pissed Edy off, so the two never speak again until Edith's former lover and Margaret's husband passes away and they meet up at his funeral. Edith discovers her sister is and has been living the high life all these years, living in a big Hollywood mansion, hob-knobbing and wearing glamorous clothes while she's barely been able to afford to eat, and her little dive bar that she runs is about to be shut down because she's three months behind on rent. what unfolds is an expertly laid-out and suspenseful plot for Edith to kill her rich twin and assume her identity.

as far as suspense goes, this one was a real nail-biter for me. maybe it's just because i like Bette so much, but once she kills her sister, it's a non-stop roller coaster of "will she get caught??" it's hard to believe she was considered washed-up at the time she made this movie. she turns in such a great performance as both sisters, and manages to play them both with very distinct personalities, and while they're both deeply flawed characters, they're also sympathetic. it couldn't have been easy to portray twins. it's like an adult, homicidal Patty Duke show!

at first when Edith murders Margaret and it becomes obvious that she's switching places with her, i was like "pffffffft, this'll never work! so stupid." but even if it is a pretty unbelievable scenario, even in an era before forensics and ballistics and all that stuff, this movie does a pretty great job of covering itself. because Margaret's husband died only the day before, and then her sister supposedly commits suicide the next day, any strange behavior her servants and friends will of course notice can be blamed on this. there's this one great scene in which it's Edth's first full day in her sister's gigantic mansion, and her butler tells her the police are waiting to speak to her in the living room (about her sister's suicide), and once she gets to the bottom of the stairs, she freaks out because she doesn't know where the room is obviously. so she tells the butler to bring them to her, watches which way he starts walking, then says she changed her mind and goes into the correct room. XD i just love characters like this, that are kinda bad and you really shouldn't be rooting for, but they're so clever and dedicated and resourceful that you have to admire them.

another thing i like about the movie is the sense of loneliness and isolation that developes, perhaps a side effect of her assuming a new life that Edith didn't anticipate. not being able to truly be herself to a single person in the world quickly becomes stifling, and maddening. she also discovers, as the layers of her sister's sordid affairs peel back, that she also inherits a whole host of unforseen problems from her sister. it's really, really interesting stuff. i thought the ending kinda sucked; i mean, i guess i knew it could only end one way, but i felt like it would've been better if it had ended about ten minutes earlier and left just a couple things hanging, though definitely pointing in a certain direction. or maybe had gone somewhere more over-the-top and dramatic, since the rest of the movie was kind of like that, but it was just kind of depressingly low-key. but i guess that was kind of the style of the time or whatever. overall it was a blast, one of Bette's best movies i think, just kind of an eh ending that doesn't really do the rest of the movie justice. this really makes me want to see more Bette movies, especially Hush, Hush Sweet Charlotte.

also started watching this new Avengers cartoon the other night before bed; they had this marathon or something of it on. it was pretty good. i think Wasp Girl or whoever is pretty annoying though, and i wish they'd gotten a better female character to be on the team, but then i realized that Marvel kinda doesn't have any good female heores that aren't a part of some other team, haha. but yeah, the animation's pretty good, the stories are okay. i'm not sure if Captain America is really as crazy as they depict him. and i'm disappointed because i fell asleep right as they were introducing Black Panther. :/

December 1, 2010

get off my case